Tips for finding balance as a teacher mom.

While writing this blog post, I am currently sipping coffee from a mug that says “momma needs more coffee”. As a teacher mom that quote couldn’t be more accurate. Coffee gives me life. Teacher moms (and dads) are truly incredible people. We give and give and expect nothing in return. That’s just how we roll. We want the best for our kids, our family, and our students. We will do anything and everything to help them succeed in life. But, you know what? It’s exhausting. By the time the day ends, I am counting down the minutes until bed time. But then here comes the guilt, the never ending guilt of not doing enough. It is time that stops.

Being a teacher mom is HARD stuff. However, I have learned a few tips along this beautiful journey of being a mom and a teacher. I want to share those tips with you and how they gave me a sense of balance in my teacher mom life.

Give Yourself Grace

The first tip for balancing life as a teacher mom is to give yourself grace and give yourself a lot of it. You deserve it. After all, you have two of the most important jobs in the world in which neither of them are a walk in the park. You take care of children ALL DAY LONG. From the moment you wake up until the moment you go to bed there is a child right by your side needing you. I make mistakes and it breaks my heart, but I know that I am not perfect, life is not perfect. But, I remind myself that I am doing the very best that I can.

If I get way too upset and make my child cry for spilling cheerios on the floor, it’s okay. I cool off for a few minutes, take a deep breath, and give him the biggest hug and say I’m sorry for yelling. If I miss another 8:00 am staff meeting because my child couldn’t find his shoes, it’s okay. I’ll explain it to my principal later and he’ll understand because he has kids of his own. If I burn dinner because I forgot to set a timer, it’s okay. I’ll give my husband a call, he’ll laugh it off and pick up dinner on his way home. These scenarios are all real life moments that have taken place in our household and it’s okay. We all survived.

Teacher moms try to juggle 674 balls and there is no way we can juggle all those. It is time we give ourselves grace and we give ourselves a lot of it.

Keep Your Family Your Top Priority

I wish I could shout this from the mountain tops, keep your family your top priority. If only I could have told myself this a few years back. Family comes before all else. It comes before that bulletin board that needs to be up, it comes before the stack of papers that need to be graded, it comes before the labels that need to be typed, it come before everything. My family is my whole world.

I write everything down. I am a visual person and I have to have a planner. Without our family planner, I would be lost.

I schedule breaks, day trips, and vacations. I love to create family memories. They make me so happy! I am most definitely that mom who wants to give my kids experiences and I want to cherish every single one.

My husband and I schedule date nights. I will admit he knows we need one way before I know, but we schedule them. I love my children, but it is so important my husband and I get some alone time.

We create and keep traditions. Traditions are where many of our favorite family memories come from. Rather it be a holiday tradition or taking a family walk every Sunday, keep them.

Leave School at School

Teacher mom, I see you bringing that bag filled with papers and projects home again. It is time that comes to an end. I will never forget the year I told myself that no matter what, I will not bring my school bag home. I will not grade papers when I should be spending time with my family. I will not write lesson plans when I should be taking care of myself. Let me tell you, this was the BEST thing I ever did. I am not exaggerating one bit. I did not feel guilty about this because I knew school could wait. I gave it my all 8 hours a day, 5 days a week. There was no need to bring work home. I was so worried I would get behind in my school work, but that was far from the case. Instead, I am well rested when I go back to school the next day or the next week and I am able to get everything I need to done. Now, when I am at school, I focus on school. Of course I spend time socializing with other staff members, but my main priority at school is my classroom and my students. That way the moment I leave school, I am truly leaving school at school. This does not mean I am the last car in the parking lot either. My students leave at 3:45 and I leave at 4:00 to pick up my own kids from daycare and preschool. By doing this, my husband is happy, my kids are happy, and I am SO happy.

If this scares you, I urge you to try this for a week. Then try it for two weeks, then three weeks, and then maybe for the whole year and just see how you feel and how your family feels.

Ask for Help

It takes a village. Ask for help. As a teacher mom this one is not easy for me. I am awful at asking for help. I feel guilty asking for help. I always want to be that perfect Pinterest mom and teacher. You guys, that does not exists and it is time we stop thinking it does. There is truly no such thing as perfect, but I do believe you can be perfectly imperfect. This is my motto. I do not try to pretend I am perfect, instead I do what I can and I ask for help for everything I can’t do.

Do I clean our house? I try, but I also have a housekeeper come in.

Do I cook dinner every night? Absolutely not. I do try, but I also have our favorite restaurants on speed dial.

Do I always do the shopping? Nope. I’m becoming best friends with the UPS driver because Amazon has become a household name. My son always like to say the brown truck is here again. Yes son, the brown truck is definitely here again.

Do I bake every birthday cake? I have a really good story for my son’s first birthday, but that deserves a blog post on it’s own. Needless to say, I ended up buying the birthday cake at our local bakery and they gave me a free smash cake. That was definitely God’s way of telling me to buy the cake. I enjoy baking, but as soon as it puts an extra sense of stress on me, I pick up the phone and order the cake.

Do I laminate and cut out all of my school projects myself? No way. I ask volunteers to come in and do these types of things. Trust me, there are volunteers out there who want to help. I also have family members help me out. I kid you not, I take my student workbooks to my parent’s house and my mom and dad pull out pages for me.

Do not feel like you have to do everything yourself. People want to help.

Let it Go

I am not talking about the beloved song that Elsa sings, but she definitely has the right attitude. Let it go.

I thought about all the things that weigh heavy on me? What is causing me to have anxiety? What is causing me to worry? Well the much talked about teacher mom guilt is the first thing that comes to my mind. Let it go. There is no room for guilt. Guilt brings us down and makes us feel like we are not good enough. It is time to truly let this go.

Joining 9 different committees and signing up to volunteer after school looks good on paper, but will that truly make you happy or cause you more stress? To me, it caused more stress. Instead, I sign up for a small handful of committees and volunteer opportunities and I do them well. If the volunteer opportunities are after school or on the weekend, I try to bring my own kids. I signed up to hand out candy for our school’s trick or treating event one year and I brought my son. He LOVED it and I enjoyed it so much! It’s time to let go some of those things that are causing you stress.

My classroom observation failed. My kids were literally bouncing off the walls. I sensed it from the moment they walked in the door. I had a great lesson planned, but my students had a different idea on how that lesson would go. My principal knew it was a bad day. I knew it was a bad day. It was hard for me to let it go, but I knew it was over and done with. I couldn’t dwell on it. I could only talk to my principal and move forward. We have no control or very little control on some things that happen in life. Let those go.

Teacher mom, I hear you. I see you. You are not alone. It truly takes a village and today I hope to become part of your village. I want to help you lose the teacher mom guilt. I want you to know that you are amazing at being a mom and a teacher.

I would love to hear some of your tips for finding balance as a teacher mom!